Saturday, August 14, 2010

Too Much Compassion

May not be a good thing.

I am still crying as I am writing this post. I have too much of a soft spot for children, old folks, and animals, especially if they are abandoned. I don't know why I was made to feel so much emotions, but I do. And sometimes, like today, it may not be a good thing,.. because I always feel like I need to save the "world" but I can't. And that makes me very sad.

It's stupid, but we were having dinner today at The French Stall (really good food by the way), and just before we left, this middle aged puppy just came to our table wagging it's tale. You can tell it used to be a domestic dog that was abandoned by it's owner. Bastard. I don't know, but I don't think I feel compelled or drawn towards dogs all the time, but this dog was special. I could tell he's got a really good nature, hence, I don't understand why it's abandoned. Think it was missing being loved as well. It was very affectionate. I like affectionate animals. It's just easier to bond that way.

I felt this really strong bond with this dog for some reason. No way to explain something like that. I just do. It had a lot of love in it's eyes. I think it felt it too, because it started to follow us as we were walking towards the mrt to go home. Julien decided maybe it was better to cross the road, that way it might stop following us, but it actually attempted to cross the road just to be able to follow us. It risked getting almost knocked down twice by two different vehicles, just to be able to follow us. My heart just melted. And I started to feel really sad because I know that we're not going to be able to take it home with us. I don't know why, but I started to cry really bad, and I couldn't stop crying.

It's so stupid, I know, but I feel very sad, and I cannot explain it. Maybe it just reminded me of my dog, that I had given up for adoption a while ago. Had the same good nature and it was a very loving dog.

Inuki is his name. I actually cried all the way home, and I still cannot stop crying. Bizarre. One of those things you just cannot explain but feel a lot.

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