Thursday, May 21, 2009

An other week-end in Singapore...

... So why am I writing about it? Well read on!

First of all, everyone should remember how exciting life is in all its little things.
For example, I remember Tinker's post about me ironing. She was saying that even the chores could be enjoyable (video of me dancing and all...). Even closer to anyone's everyday life (yeah ironing is not always fun and many of us get someone else to do it) when you cross a road at the green light and you see, at the last second as you're mid way to the other side, this mad taxi speeding towards you. Your heart skips a beat and the 4 final steps to safety feel so exciting, then the gush of adrenaline that shoots after as you start walking again, more lightly and alive than you were a second ago. This is our moment of "super", there is a Wonderwoman or Superman hiding in each and everyone of us, doesn't it make you feel great?

So what happened in our week-end that was so exciting?? Well nothing out of the ordinary unless you look at if from different points of view.

Friday night was starting off as the home-stay kind... Tinker was wanting to finish up this box she started decorating (it's her thing at the moment!), and I was ready to plunge back into one of my favourite books which I'm reading again The Lord of the Rings. But as we were settling down like an already too old couple the phone rang... We both stopped in mid air. Like in that split second when the glint of sun off the taxi's window hits the corner of your eye. Before your mind understands that something exciting is coming up, but your senses already know it.
I picked up the phone and it was good old Jimme (pronounce Yemmuh, he's Dutch) who was enquiring about my idea of going trekking the next day. We spoke for a while and very soon realised that both our couples were settling down for a home stay Friday night so we decided to change our destinies. Our courage reunited allowed us to find the strength to go fight boredom in a far away land: Holland Village. We found our combat zone: the Wala Wala Bar out on a terrace between a table of fat English men and one of skinny Singaporeans boys with a quiet couple to cover the last angle, our battle plan could be put in place.

The fighters were by order of appearance: Tinker, The Yeti, Gen whom we called up as back up later but she managed to reach before the big of our troops: Yihmay and Jimme (I said pronounce: Yemmuh!!). The weapons were in numbers and anyone could choose what they wanted, but I will sacrifice my keyboard more to write it all down to the last detail for you.
Some Mexican beers were at one for one at $14 all night so they had to be part of the battle, the others were on to coke or juices. After our first few rounds of beer we got shot by two tequilas with salt and lime, but we survived the blow and managed to Liberate Cuba in a few gulps. This last turn in our battle was hard on our minds and ammunition (dollars). We even lost Gen in the event. But the war was not over... Although we decided to change battlefield and got a carry-out from Seven-Eleven, the second battle of the boredom fight could start this time at a table in an empty food court.

The carry-out consisted of one Tiger, one Bordeaux and a can of energy drink pre-mixed with vodka. Our bodies were still buzzed from the last battle but we decided to fight the worse enemy first and the energy drink was downed. It was tough... Some of us almost gave up immediately. It was like a chemical attack both in our bodies and spirits. The taste was as bad as bad medicine and the alcohol contained couldn't have been natural either. We were of course laughing a lot and the discussion was not stopping by then... But time was fighting against us. Yemmuh, sorry Jimme and I could take the physical strength but Tinker and Yihmay failed and our worse Enemy took them away in his metal box on wheels, with Taxi written on the side...
So two fighters left and two weapons fully loaded. Jimme (pronou... you know now right?) took the French cylinder and I the Asian one.
The end of the battle shall remain a mystery to the world... Let's say that the human is very resistant. As we were leaving the battlefield, an Indian prisoner tried to con us into buying a cat, but we deciphered his scheme in time and managed to run away. The next thing I remember is the sun in my eye and my head in my b...

After nursing my head Round 3 of the battle against boredom could start, and this time we would not get caught in drugs or any malevolent products... We were going out trekking.
The battle field: MacRitchie Reservoir. The fighters in order of appearance: Yihmay, Jimme and The Yeti (who got lost on the way...). Tinker had an other fight to take against windows showing clothes. I shall let her give you the details of this battle that I did not witness (Alleluhiah!).

MacRithie Reservoir consists of water in the middle (the reservoir!) and jungle around it. Our very first blog was about this I think.
Our plan was to take the 11Km tour in the jungle... It didn't go quite as planned.

First of all we got lost, a crooked bridge made us loose our bearings and we started our walk around the reservoir instead of heading into the jungle.
A board walk goes along the southern part of the lake, and once we were engaged on it there was no turning back: a bunch of kids was following us, themselves followed by families etc. Turning back would have meant to throw all these innocent people in the water and they didn't deserve it.

Our first encounter with hostile population was monkeys. Jimme had the great idea of opening a can of drink just as we were approaching a bunch of our cousins and their boss wanted his share of sweet juice.

We managed to walk away unharmed, but the poor monkey is still thirsty.
We carried on our path with courage and might, fighting the dragon-flies away and even lifting up trees to open a safe passageway.

And when we finally reached the end, one of us had already injured his feet. The blisters were probably caused by the heat of the dragon-flies' fire.

We still continued our walk, but the time lost was huge and we still had 9Km to go...

The landscape suddenly changed in the space of a few steps. The water was still to our right, but to our left nice smooth green and well kept grass replaced the jungle mess. We could hear some weird noise: "whoooichh... ping...".
And we saw coming from the top of a hill an other hostile population. All dressed in strange looking pants and carrying a bag of weapons never seen by my eyes. They used white bullets about the size of an egg that they hit with the weapons carried in their bags. When they almost hit someone they shouted "FORE", probably a curse for missing their target so closely.
We hurried off these lands that were too unfamiliar to us, Yihmay even said "this looks like Europe"... Just the name gives me the creeps. Who would want to go to a place with such a horrible name. Asia sounds nice and smooth. It comes from the back of your mouth carried along your tongue and is delicately delivered in soft blow, Asia. Europe is harsh, starting from the throat and cut a the end like a guillotine chops a head.

This land left behind, we entered a swamp of the deepest kind. A board walk was carrying us above deep dark muddy waters swarming with mosquitoes. Luckily we were followed closely by other adventurers who seemed to have a licking for these insects. Our skins were spared from bites and none of the fighters fell into the black mud. But our bodies were getting tired and hungry. We still had 6 Km to go before the end of the trail. At the turn out of the swamps a high tower could take us over the trees to get the view and help us detect any traps set on our way.
The view was quite breathtaking, but unfortunately the thick trees forbid us to see our track.

While we were resting on top of the tower it suddenly started swaying from side to side. We heard some footsteps on the stairs below and we had nowhere to run or to hide so all was left was to fight the enemy coming up.
A dwarf appeared first. In his blue t-shirt and shorts. He actually seemed scared to find us here which gave us more confidence. We questioned him about the way he took to get here, trying to find out any traps that were lain on the way, but he cowarded away. Up the stairs soon came an other bigger character carrying a tiny dwarf with long hair. The small one was making little wailing sounds and seemed to talk in a language that I could not decipher. It sounded a little like Singlish. They were locals... We felt relieved for a second but at that moment our eyes turned in their sockets and we almost jumped off the tower to escape a new danger. An old witch had just appeared at the top of the staircase. One of her eyes was white, but you could guess it could see the spirits of darkness. She looked at us menacingly for a second and then over our shoulders. When she saw how high we were she almost fell. Her height sickness saved us from a sure death. The tiny longed hair dwarf was still whining and all four of them decided that they couldn't fight us and retreated down the staircase. We had won and to tease them chased them down the stairs. We also had to get on our way before nightfall. I had no wish to spend my night in the jungle.

We still had a long way to go... So we walked on.

We finally reached a small ranger house populated with more monkeys. As we were not carrying any food on us they stayed pretty calm. We even managed to take some water from their fountain. A map on the wall showed us we could take a short cut back to civilised world and instead of 4.5 Km left, it was 2.

To our relief we finally hit a road. A driver refused to hitch us under the pretext that he was going to the club and we walked until we could board a long people carrier. Our journey was over and we could finally regain the peacefulness of our homes for a good night sleep.

Our battle against boredom was won for these two days, and I hope this text didn't bring you to this state. We rested on the third day to recover and get ready for new adventures at work. Tinker will likely tell you about her shopping day as extensively as she recounted it to me. It turns out she was home much later that I with bags full of goods... An other adventure all together.

1 comment:

micheltdt said...

Hello Julien, coming back from our trip in South of France, we found this superb coverage of your fights for life ! Your narrative is efficient. After your story I think that GWB Jr can take his secret mass destruction weapons and stuff them ! All the best to Ting and you.